Two Things

Thing The First - It always amazes me when life provides the answers I am seeking. If I just remain quiet and listen the answer will come. I have been struggling with a decision for the last 2 weeks, well really 6 years. I have been completely stressed out about this decision lately. It has been truly weighing me down. So today I go into rehearsal for the first read through of my next show. Low and behold the answer smacks me in the face like a cold carp. All it took was me sitting calmly and listening to life for a bit and life provided the answer.

Thing The Second - I don't expect life to be fair but at the same time I truly believe in the Laws of Karma. If you do good, good will come to you. If you do bad, bad wil come to you. That being said nothing infuriates me more than someone succeeding based on lies. People who are frightened of the success of others. I work in a collaborative field. When one person working on a producton succeeds everyone who works on that production succeeds. Art shouldn't be a pissing contest. We shouldn't be stabbing each other in the back. We have this ass-kisser at work. He is getting really far. It infuriates me. The unfairness of it all makes me want to sink to his level. I want to wait until the teacher has turned his back to us and beat the crap out of the kid. I want to leave flaming bags of poo on his doorstep. I know I shouldn't but I still desperately want to do those things. I know I just need to breathe and let him screw himself. I can only concern myself with my behaviour and hope he comes to his senses.

fortune
Originally uploaded by Johnxiv.

from Kathleen's desk in the Costume Shop

No Good Can Come From Bad

The past few weeks the rickshaw of my life has been rolling, uncontrollably downhill. I haven't been able to catch up to life. It seems like I have been reacting instead of acting. I am trying to catch up. It is so easy to fall into patterns. I have fallen into some patterns that are bad for me but am trying to change them. Have to keep my eyes on the prize.

Hanging out with Kathleen and Rose. I have laughed so much I have peed my pants. Life is good. Little known fact: brownies on the floor look like poo. Also I made out with a care bear.